Escape from Reality
by EsperanzaYSueos
Summary: Victoria Payne finds herself intertwined with Arthur Fleck's life before it's too late for her to say no. warning: explicit language and references to adult themes. I originally published this on Ao3 but there are not many Joker fics here so I wanted to spread the love 3
1. Chapter 1

When you asked me for some more I was energized

Couldn't see your eyes

They were up inside

When you asked if I could see I was pulverized

Set in overdrive

Test and recognize

\- FLUME

* * *

"OK class, that concludes our review for the midterm on Thursday. Remember to study these topics, you'll miss a lot more than you think." My professor said as her voice rang through the auditorium. I tried to remind myself that I was almost done. In a few months, I would have my degree and would be done.

I groggily put my things back into my bag and checked the time. 9:30 P.M. At least she finished on-time. I shuffled outside with the other students and was greeted with a blinding number of blue and red lights. There were countless police cars in the area. I walked towards the subway and approached a cop near the entrance.

"Is something happening?" I asked him in a slightly meek, concerned voice. He sighed and rubbed his face anxiously. "There were three murders in the subway tonight, miss." My mouth went agape and I felt a nervousness creeping up my spine. Before I could say anything he continued.

"You should be fine because there's a high police presence out of precaution, but we are asking the public to keep an eye out for a man dressed as a clown." I frowned.

"Wow, okay. Thank you for letting me know. Have a good night." I smiled briefly and then quickly headed down the subway to the trains.

A clown? Could this man have chosen a creepier costume to use? I shook my head. Banishing all the thoughts from my mind.

I'll be fine. I just need to pay attention to my surroundings.

I boarded my train that went towards my apartment and I looked around the car. There were a few other students but the train was mostly empty and quiet.

No clown sightings yet, thank god.

The train came to a screeching halt and I exited the train. No one else got off and the platform was empty.

Thoroughly creeped out, I quickly walked up the stairs and was greeted to the familiar sight of garbage and a few sketchy, but not clown-like, figures. I relaxed and began my final walk to my apartment. I kept my head down and walked forward, avoiding eye contact with every person I passed.

Then I turned the block.

And I saw him.

A clown. Walking down the block on the other side of the street.

Towards me.

My breathing became labored and I could feel my heart start to race as the cop's words ran through my head repeatedly. I began to walk quickly, occasionally taking the time to look behind me.

He's going the same direction that I am. But he's walking slow. Is that worse? Does that mean he's following me?

In the spur of the moment, I quickly went down a different block to test my theory. He didn't follow me down my alternate route. I took a deep breath and began to walk normally again.

God, Victoria, it was nothing. Why did you freak out? Even if he's murdered people doesn't mean he's after you. There was probably something bad going down. Drug-related, maybe a bad relationship. But they probabl-

My internal monologue stopped when I arrived back to my original route and it happened again.

Clown. Again.

At this point, my apartment was a block away and I decided it was best to just focus on getting there. I had already determined that he wasn't following me.

Finally, in front of my apartment, I rushed inside and then focused on getting my mail so I could head upstairs where it was safe.

Feeling better than I was finally inside, I rushed to my mailbox, unlocked it, and pulled out the mail.

Then, again, a surprise. I heard the door to the lobby open behind me and I quickly spun around.

"Fuck!" The clown figure that I assumed was following me was now inside my apartment building. I yelled as loud as I could, not knowing what else to do.

"Why are you following me? What the fuck do you want from me? I didn't do anything to you!" I screamed at him while shaking and clutching my mail to my chest.

He said nothing. There was just silence.

Then he started to laugh. He tried to say something between words, but he couldn't get them out. He laughed continuously as he walked closer to me while I backed into a corner in the mail cage. I felt tears rolling down my cheek as I looked for a way out.

Then he held out a small business card.

Still having a mental breakdown, I wiped my tears in confusion and looked at him as he continued to laugh while handing me a card. I read it and quickly gave it back. It said he had a condition that made him have uncontrollable laughter. I winced with embarrassment.

"O-oh my g-god. I'm so sorry. I didn't know." I said between heavy breaths. "I thought you were a murderous clown," I said, laughing a bit at the end. "Please excuse me," I said slipping past him and heading to the elevator. I avoided eye contact and just wanted to remove myself from the situation.

I am a fucking idiot.

* * *

In the days following my embarrassing encounter with the man dressed as a clown, I tried to distract myself by studying for my midterm. It felt like I would go to classes, work, and then come home and study in an endless, mind-numbing cycle. I closed my book one night and rubbed my head as I had developed a small migraine.

Probably just from stress , I thought.

I looked back at my notes and then at the topics I still needed to go over and I sighed.

"How am I ever going to go through this material and then master it before Thursday?" I said to myself, staring at the paper for what felt like an eternity. I rubbed my eyes and then felt tears forming.

God, why am I even bothering? Is a stupid degree worth this much stress? I never have time for anything else. I'm not happy. Living in Gotham is already dreary enough as it is. I started to lightly sob as these intrusive thoughts filled my head. Then, I swiftly picked up my textbook and threw it at the wall. As soon as the book hit the wall I heard a loud commotion.

Oops, I hope I didn't just start an argument . I said in my head. I wiped the barely formed tears from my eyes and looked towards my bed. I guess I've studied enough for today.

I crawled into bed and easily dozed off into a deep sleep.

The next day started typically for me. I woke up, went through my morning routine, and headed out the door to my first class of the day. This is where it became unusual.

As I exited my apartment, my next-door neighbor, who I barely ever saw, was also leaving. My mind remembered the commotion of yesterday when I threw my textbook. I muttered out a good morning and then figured that I should make an apology.

"Uh.. good morning." I started, and he turned to stare intently at me. He seemed surprised by my initiation.

"If you heard a loud bang against your wall last night, that was actually me. Sorry, just the frustrations of college..." He looked like he wanted to say something, but wasn't sure what to say. There was a brief pause of silence.

"I guess, at least I wasn't like the person who set off an actual gun the other night, right?" I broke the awkward silence and laughed at my own comment. He finally gave a faint grin.

"Yeah . Wasn't me. I definitely don't have a gun." He said with a wide smile. I looked at him for a brief second, taken aback.

"Wait, you don't actually have a gun, right? That wasn't you?" I said, moving towards him slightly.

Then, as I moved closer to him I had a moment of clarity.

"Wait… did you… happen to arrive late the other night dressed as a clown?" I quickly scanned his height, hair, and eyes. "It was you, right? At the mailbox?"

He looked abashed, maybe slightly flattered that I recognized him. He nodded.

"I was. And you were the one who yelled at me." I clenched my teeth as he told the truth. We both walked towards the elevator and I pressed the call button.

"Yeah, sorry about that again." I put on a serious expression as the elevator dinged and we stepped inside. "But also… did you hear about the triple murder on the subway?"

"I did." He said, "it looked terrible."

"Right? Just horrible. Um… I heard they're looking for someone dressed as a clown, so if you dress like that often you might want to be careful. Also because you might scare some people. Like me. Or rather, as you did with me." I rambled on, trying to drop a hint.

Nobody just goes around in a clown costume, right? It's too big of a coincidence. I can't shake the feeling that he's involved somehow.

We finally exited the building together and said brief goodbyes as we parted ways. I headed to classes and he went wherever he was going. God only knows.

I attended two classes and then, with my brain sufficiently fried, headed home.

As soon as I entered the lobby, I noticed two seemingly out of place men having a conversation. They looked back to me and then at each other.

"Good afternoon, miss," one of the men started, "would you happen to live here? We're detectives with the Gotham City Police Department." They pulled their badges out to prove that they were detectives. Their names were Patrick and Morris.

I nodded, "I do, why? Did something happen?"

The other defective, Morris, interrupted. "Well, I'm sure you heard about the triple murder on the subway by now. Our main suspect lives in this building but we can never catch him at the right time. If you don't mind us asking, which unit do you live in?"

I gulped. I knew exactly who they were looking for and I lived right next to him.

"Unit 1007," I said as if I had no idea of the significance of my words. The detectives looked at each other.

Patrick walked towards me, arms crossed. "Miss… I'm sorry, but I never got your name."

"Victoria. Victoria Payne." I chirped.

"Miss Victoria, would you be able to sit down and answer some of our questions? Our suspect, Arthur Fleck, is your neighbor. These were tragic homicides and any information you can give us would be helpful for getting justice for the three young men that were murdered." Patrick grinned slightly and seemed eager for my help.

I hesitated, "um… I guess I can talk for a little bit, but I do have a big exam tomorrow so I can't talk for long."

"That's perfectly fine with us."

The detectives sat down with me in my apartment, but I think they quickly realized that I wasn't a great witness. I told them about how I hardly ever saw Arthur in the first place, the frequent strange sounds that came from their apartment, and I told them about how we chatted this morning.

But I didn't tell them about him and his clown costume. I simply told them that I saw him when I was leaving this morning and yesterday I threw a textbook at their wall, so I needed to apologize.

After these few brief questions, they left my apartment and headed to Arthur's. I pressed my ear against the wall, trying to hear what they were talking about. It sounded like Arthur wasn't home, only a woman was in the apartment with the detectives.

Then suddenly, there was yelling and distress. I rushed over to the door and knocked loudly. Detective Morris opened the door and I immediately saw Detective Patrick on the landline.

An older woman sitting in the living room chair looked unconscious and both of them looked petrified.

Patrick looked at me with a face of concern and said, "we're calling an ambulance, something's wrong with his mother."


	2. Chapter 2

I remember when I first noticed that you liked me back

We were sitting down in a restaurant waiting for the check

We had made love earlier that day with no strings attached,

But I could tell that something had changed how you looked at me then

\- CIGARETTES AFTER SEX

* * *

I tried to focus on studying again, but my mind was occupied with the thought of the woman in Arthur's apartment.

Did the detectives do something to her? And what exactly happened to her?

I stared at the open notebook and pencil in my hand. Then, I abruptly stood up to walk towards my window and peeled the curtain back to look at the streets below. There were people dressed in bright clown masks walking the streets. More people appeared in clown masks every day. You could feel the tension rising between the classes every hour.

I quietly stared at the streets but then suddenly heard a door close next door. Arthur.

I waited a moment, but then ran out and knocked on his door. Numerous thoughts raced through my head and I wasn't sure exactly what to ask about.

He finally opened the door and I got a good look at his exhausted face. I opened my mouth to say something but my mind went blank. He stared at me.

"Can I help you?" He asked.

"Uh, A-Arthur, right? I don't think we've officially met. I'm Victoria and we talked this morning. I'm sorry about your mother. I was here when it happened. Is she alright?" I stuttered but tried to show genuine concern.

"She's not doing the best, but she's doing ok. She had a stroke." He said wearily.

"I'm sorry to hear that." I broke eye contact with him and stared at my shoes. I said nothing but then knew that I couldn't keep what was gnawing at me inside.

"Also, stop me if this is rude and out of line, but… were you involved in the triple murder on the subway that I asked about earlier today?" He squinted his eyes at me and gave me a look of confusion.

"Did you talk to those detectives?" He asked. I looked at him with wide eyes.

"Honestly, I did," I admitted my involvement but then quickly clarified. "But I didn't tell them that I saw you as a clown that night. I just told them about how you were my neighbor and-"

Arthur cut me off. "Do you know what they did to my mother?" He asked me with intense eyes. I paused and shook my head.

"No. I was trying to listen through the wall but all I heard was a normal conversation and then yelling. Then I ran over there and they were freaking out and calling an ambulance." I frowned. "Sorry, that's all I know."

There was an uncomfortable silence. I felt his pain.

"I might have done something… bad." Arthur started. "You know how we do things sometimes and just try to forget about them?" I nodded... hesitantly.

"I think I get what you're trying to say. But if it's not too intrusive of me, can I possibly... come in?" I looked inside his apartment. There were no lights on and you could barely see anything. He looked inside the apartment and then waved me inside.

I sat down on the chair and looked around the room. It was obvious that Arthur's mother had put her own taste into the decorations. The place was fairly tidy but it was obvious that he had also not been worrying about keeping the place clean.

Arthur paced slightly as I looked around the room. "Do you want… tea? I think that's what my mother said to offer guests." I smiled slightly at him.

"Yes, please. I would like that."

He went to heat up the water in the kettle and I decided to follow him to the kitchen. I leaned against the wall near the entrance of the kitchen.

"So what did it feel like?" I asked as he filled up the kettle with water.

"What did what feel like?" He responded back. I rolled my eyes.

"You know. What did it feel like to kill those guys? Did you feel guilty? Sad? Not remorseful at all?"

Arthur stared at the stovetop while he turned the heat on for the kettle. He shrugged. "At first I felt kind of guilty. I was scared of what my mother would think. But then I realized that they deserved it."

I tilted my head, confused. "Deserve it? What did they do?"

"They were throwing fries at a woman on the train. They were assholes." He leaned against the counter and crossed his arms. "They attacked me. So then I attacked them."

"I get it. When I was younger there were these girls in middle school that would torment me all the time. I ended up punching one of them in the face and I think they finally realized that they should leave me alone." I laughed at my own story. "Now I'm just boring. I'll probably finish school and then go into a nice job. Work 9 to 5. Get married. Have kids."

As I thought about my reality I frowned. I sniffled a bit and looked at the kettle. I avoided all eye contact with Arthur. "But can I really do that for the rest of my life? What's even the point? I get my biomedical engineering degree and then do something that I've never even really done for the rest of my life."

The kettle whistled. Arthur poured us cups and steeped the tea. We sat back down in the living room. I sat down into the same chair while he took the couch.

"Enough of my dumb problems. Tell me about yourself." I told him, blowing on my tea to cool it down.

He sipped his tea. "I had a job. Then they fired me. I was a clown."

I shook my head. "I'm sorry to hear that. But now it makes sense why you were in a clown costume when I saw you. Are you going to get another job?"

"Well, I wanted to be a comedian," Arthur continued. "But a certain talk show host recently made fun of me on live television so that probably won't happen." I laughed slightly but then stopped myself when seeing his serious expression.

"Arthur, come on," I playfully hit his leg, "they say any press is good press, right? Honestly, you're the last person I'd expect to be a comedian...but some people really like uh, dry humor." I smirked at him.

He smirked back at me.

"Why are you being nice to me?" He asked.

I shrugged. "I don't know. I guess I just needed an escape from my routine. I have an exam soon and I've been stressed but also apathetic. Like, I'm so used to the same thing that I want to take some risks. Honestly, any reasonable person would say it's a bad idea to go into a possible murderer's home and have tea with him. But I want the thrill. I want to see what happens." I sipped my tea and tried to read his expression.

We shared a moment of silence. I bit my lip. My mouth felt dry.

"Will you sleep with me?" I said while staring intensely into his eyes.

"...what?" He said quietly. I sighed.

"I know you heard me. I just-" I paused and considered my words carefully.

"I feel like ruining my life but I don't want to ruin-ruin it. I want to do something irresponsible and fun. Something like fucking my weird neighbor who might dress up as a clown sometimes and who may or may not be on Gotham's most wanted criminals' list."

I moved from the living room chair and sat next to him on the couch. I clenched my tea as I tried to figure out his reception to my offer.

"I understand. I'd like that. But I just- I don't think you want to with me," he spoke with a sadness in his voice. "I've never actually done anything like that." I smiled slightly and put our cups on the table.

"Well, I have. And I don't care that you haven't." I gave him a genuine smile and moved closer to him.

He turned his face towards me and put a hand on my thigh. I stared into his eyes, noticing for the first time all the different colors they reflected.

Screw it, I thought as I went in for the kiss. We locked lips and I gave him a slow, passionate kiss.

After a few seconds, I pulled back and took a moment to look into his eyes. He smiled at me and I smiled back. "Just relax and do what feels right," I said while pulling myself on to his lap to face him, "that's the secret to being a good kisser."

It felt nice to have another body in the bed that night.


	3. Chapter 3

Well, I can't find my way back home

I'll listen to you if you want me to

But you have to share a smoke

Yeah, I've been running against the wind

And I can hear the angels calling

The madness has been pulling me right

\- FOSTER THE PEOPLE

* * *

After our first encounter, I found myself spending more time with Arthur. The days following his mother's hospitalization seemed to breeze by. I tried to study and pay attention in my classes, but ultimately found daydreaming in class more fulfilling. I wouldn't hesitate to join him for a meal if it meant skipping a class or two.

I knew in the back of my head that it was a terrible idea, but the high that I felt when enjoying life make the guilty feelings go away.

Then my exams happened.

I entered the class with a pit in my stomach and a sense of unease. I didn't think I was fully prepared, but I reassured myself that I had studied- even if I didn't study as much as I had hoped to initially.

The proctors handed out the exams and as soon as I got mine I skimmed through the content.

I know this stuff… but can't really do those problems. Might be able to do this… no, yes, no, no...

I felt a lack of confidence, but decided eventually to just go for it. It wasn't like I could go back in time and study more.

Then, after two hours of work, I was finished. I handed the exam off to the proctors and headed straight home.

I made it into my apartment, threw my things on the floor, and collapsed onto my bed. I stayed quiet to see if I could hear Arthur next door.

There were zero signs of him being home.

I sighed and pulled the covers of my bed over me. Might as well take a nap , I thought.

The next thing that woke me up was laughing. Still dazed, I tried to get out of bed and put my ear to the wall to listen closely. Sure enough, sounds of laughter moved through the air.

I throw myself back onto the bed and sighed. Doesn't his condition get worse the more distressed he is emotionally? The only time I've really seen it is when I yelled at him in the lobby.

"Is he okay?" I wondered out loud, trying to devise some sort of way to comfort him. Would he even want to be comforted? Unsure but determined, I picked up one of my blankets and wrapped it around me.

I made it to his door and gingerly knocked. The laughing continued and I sighed.

"Arthur, it's me, Victoria. I just wanted to see if you were okay. If you need anything I'll be right next door." I said through the door, listening intently. The laughing continued.

I began to walk back to my apartment until I heard a door open behind me. I spun around to see Arthur looking in my direction. I shuffled back towards him.

"Can I come in?" I asked as he continued laughing. He nodded and ushered me in. I quickly closed the door behind us and looked at him sadly.

"Did something happen?" I asked.

He nodded again and headed towards the couch with his continuous laughter. He picked up a new cigarette, lighting it clumsily. He could barely smoke it. I sighed and sat next to him.

"I wish I could help you," I started. "But I'm not sure how, so just know that I'll be here if you need anything." I placed my hand on his knee and stared at the coffee table that contained miscellaneous items. An empty cup. A television remote. A lighter. Arthur's prized pack of cigarettes.

"Can I have one?" I asked as I pulled one of his cigarettes from its carton.

"Sure," he said and handed me the lighter. I placed the cigarette in my mouth and lit it. We laid back on the couch and relaxed. I said nothing to him while he laughed so much that he could barely find time to breathe, let alone smoke.

Ten minutes later, he stopped and was silent. I breathed a sigh of relief.

I waited a moment, scared that I might say the wrong thing.

"Feeling better now?" I asked. "And is it okay for me to ask what happened?" He shrugged and silently continued his next cigarette. I understood and also continued smoking.

Then, a few minutes passed and he spoke.

"I went down to the state hospital to find the truth."

"I stole the file." He stood up and walked to the kitchen. He brought me back a neutral-colored folder with the words 'Penny Fleck' on the front.

"Is this your mother?" I asked. He nodded. I opened up the file and began to read. My heart sank as I shifted through the documents and newspaper clippings. I didn't know what to say.

"This is… absolutely terrible and unfair. I'm sorry. You never deserved any of this." I said to him, biting my lips.

"I'm going tomorrow." Arthur started. I looked at him, perplexed.

"Going where?" I asked.

"To see her. I'm going to see her for the last time," he continued.

That's understandable , I thought to myself. If someone allowed me to be abused or abused me I would never want to see them again, for my own sanity.

"Do you want me to come with you?" I asked him, thinking he might have some moral support. He looked at me and shrugged. "You can come to the hospital, but I want to talk to her alone."

I nodded and smiled at him. "Of course," I replied.

I checked the time on my watch and then started to stand up. "It's pretty late Arthur, and if we're going to see your mom tomorrow I probably need to get to sleep." But as soon as I started to move away from him, he abruptly grabbed my wrist.

"Wait, don't go." He said and pulled me closer. Surprised, I pulled my wrist away from him and sighed.

"Arthur, I had a long day with my exams. So I'm just going to relax for a while. It's nothing personal." I said while crossing my arms. He got up quickly and moved in front of my path to the door.

"What is it?" I asked, taking note of his slightly defensive stance. I tried to move around him but was stopped in my tracks when he also moved in the same direction.

"Come on, you're going to tell a known killer 'no'?" He smiled at me. I furrowed my brow. He seemed less emotional than before, but now he was definitely acting different.

"What the hell? You're saying I don't have a choice or something? What's wrong with you?" I asked, trying to hide the intimidation in my voice.

"There's nothing wrong with me," he said with slight offense in his voice. "I've just been feeling more like myself. More... confident I guess." I looked at him and slightly shook my head.

"What does that even mean?"

He laughed slightly, "It means I stopped taking my medication. After I found my mother's file, I realized she was wrong. There's nothing wrong with me. I feel so much better now, too."

My eyes went wide. Shit, this is news to me. I sat back down on the couch and just looked at him.

"You've thoroughly threatened me. Now what? Obviously, I'm not gonna leave for fear of my life. You're just going to make me sit here while I die of boredom?" I took another cigarette and lit it, then motioned my hand to tell him to hurry up.

He smirked. "Don't worry, we'll have plenty to do." I froze up and felt adrenaline in my veins again.

"I'm going to be on Murray's show. And it has to be perfect. Just sit there." He said, smirking.

Whew, I thought, I was concerned it was going to be something really bad.

Arthur ended up putting on a show of sorts, and then we fell asleep in the bed.

The next morning he woke me up so we could head to the hospital. We left, and I begrudgingly stopped by my apartment to freshen up.

When we arrived to the hospital Arthur instructed me to stay in the lobby. I found a seat and collected as many magazines as I could to keep myself occupied. I partly wished I was at home and for a moment considered just leaving. Is he a good tracker? I wondered to myself.

If I timed it right I guess I could catch a train to my parents. I wonder if they'd take me in with the excuse of 'I'm being chased by a murderer.'

But before I could even finish reading one of my magazines, Arthur marched out of the ICU area. I looked at him bewildered, but before I could say anything he pulled me up by my arm and said, "Let's go."

"That was fast," was all I could say as we speed-walked through the hospital.

"Why are we walking so quickly? Your mom can't walk yet- can she?"

Arthur basically dragged me out of the hospital. Once we got closer to the trains and away from the hospital, he pulled me into an alley.

"I did it. She's gone." He said, lighting a cigarette and bouncing his leg while leaning against the building. "She suffocated."

" What?!" I exclaimed. "I thought you were going to tell her 'goodbye, see you never again', instead you fucking killed her?"

He looked at me, almost surprised. "You know everything she did. All the lies she told. Don't you think people like that need a taste of their own medicine?" I just looked at him, mouth agape. Speechless.

I pondered my options and took a moment to really consider his homicidal tendencies.

I turned to walk towards the trains again.

"I'm leaving," I said quietly but was stopped again.

Arthur forcefully grabbed my arm. I pulled against him.

" Let me go! " I screamed at him. He carefully released my arm. I looked at him, surprised at his reaction.

"I know you've felt like me, Victoria," he started. I scowled at him.

"I am not like you. I'm not a murderer," I said. He laughed slightly at my statement.

" Think about it. You're just like me. We live in the same place, we both don't know what the hell we're doing in our lives. You might feel good going to college or _whatever,_ but we both know it doesn't matter in the end. You told me this." He stepped towards me, and as he spoke to me, his voice almost had a sing-songy tone. Strange for something so depressing.

"Maybe all of that's true, but why the hell should I let you drag me around? Clearly, you're doing your things and I'm doing mine. College, or whatever." I looked at him, ending my sentence sarcastically.

He grabbed my hand.

"Just help me, help me punish the bad guys."

He smiled a strange smile.

I frowned.

"Ok. But it'll be just this one thing."


	4. Chapter 4

Another domino falls

And another domino falls

A little at a time

I feel more alive

I let the scale tip and feel all of it

It's uncomfortable but right

\- SLEEPING AT LAST

* * *

Arthur's sudden change in personality should have been a sign to get some authority figure's attention. But something clicked inside my head when we were in the alley. I was instinctively scared of him, but I also knew that he couldn't, or rather, wouldn't easily make me his victim.

We got back to the apartment building as the sun finished setting. Arthur "invited" me into his apartment. But before going over I decided to grab some popcorn from my own apartment. We shared it and I fell asleep while we watched the television.

The next day was another day of action.

"So… where are we going?" I asked Arthur as we stepped outside.

"Just the drugstore," he replied. "I can't go onto Murray's show like this."

I nodded, trying to ensure my safety. It made sense. He seemed to enjoy dressing up.

We made it to the drug store and left with, in my opinion, unusual items. Arthur decided to buy green hair dye and a variety of face makeup.

"What's your plan with this?" I asked him while we checked-out.

"If Murray thinks I'm a joker, I'll give him a Joker." He was serious. I wasn't sure what to say, so I settled with an "Okay."

We headed back to the apartment after buying Arthur's items. But on our way back Arthur suddenly stopped in front of a nice-looking restaurant that I had never noticed before. "Let's go inside," he said. He stepped towards the restaurant but I grabbed his arm before it was out of reach.

"Wait, Arthur, this looks like a really nice restaurant. I don't think they'll even let us inside." I gestured towards our clothes. Arthur was wearing his standard polo shirt, jacket, and slacks. I was wearing a sweater and jeans. He simply sneered and headed inside anyway.

I rolled my eyes and then followed him inside. Sure enough, the inside was gorgeous. It was fine dining to the greatest extent. The place had immaculate decor and the hosts were dressed better than us. It was lunchtime so it wasn't busy, but I could hear voices nearby further inside the restaurant.

"Two, please," Arthur said to the man who appeared to be a host. The host looked at us with an amused expression. I think he thought we were kidding. Embarrassed, I stood behind Arthur and tried to gently tug him away.

" Let's go, " I whispered. " He probably thinks we're joking."

Arthur pushed me away.

The host frowned.

"Sir. I apologize, but this is a fine dining establishment. Our dress code requires formal wear to be worn at all times." Arthur laughed.

"I'll pay extra then." He said as he opened his wallet and placed a neat pile of cash on the counter. I looked at him, shocked. I thought he was basically in poverty.

"Again, I can't seat you. This is about reputation and appearance, not money." The host pushed the money away and tried to hide his annoyance behind a polite smile.

Arthur crossed his arms and sighed. I couldn't see his face but I could tell from his posture that he was not happy and borderline furious.

"How about now?" Arthur said as he pulled a gun hidden from his jacket and placed it directly on the host's forehead. I gasped and felt my body freeze up. The host put his hands up and shook with fear. I stopped breathing as I watched Arthur begin to move the safety.

My body went into full fight-or-flight mode. I quickly lunged towards Arthur and yanked the gun from his hands. I was fast enough that Arthur didn't even notice me right behind him until the gun was safely in my hands.

I held onto the gun tightly. Arthur slowly turned towards me with eyes that showed a mix of betrayal and anger. I looked around for an escape route, trying to predict Arthur's next move.

Then I watched as the host and Arthur fell to the ground. The host took him to the ground and pinned him down so he was immobile. Arthur struggled as the host yelled at me to do something.

" Use the phone on the desk to call the police! "

Before I could even think about taking any action Arthur also yelled at me.

"No, don't. If you call the police this all will be for nothing! " The host struggled to keep him down. "How you think the police will treat someone who harbored and helped a fugitive?" Arthur asked. My mind was racing and I couldn't think properly.

"Shut your mouth." The host said, putting Arthur into a chokehold and then looked me dead in the eyes. "Call. The. Police. Now ."

This is it . I could see two distinct paths for my life now in front of me.

But I couldn't see very far down them.

Then, a loud bang echoed through the restaurant.

"Oh my god," I said under my breath, realizing what I had just done. Arthur's piercing laugh rang through the restaurant. The host let go of him and we all stared at the wound that was now in his lower abdomen. Without another thought, Arthur pushed him off and grabbed my arm. We ran, and all I thought about was how fast my legs were moving.

I think Arthur said a few words to me while we ran, but I could barely hear him and my mind couldn't process the moment. I was stuck in a dissociative state as my ears rang.

When I fully came back to reality I was in Arthur's apartment, sitting on the couch. He smoked a cigarette and was assembling his hair dye and face paint.

"Arthur," I mumbled. He looked toward me. My voice cracked.

"What the hell am I going to do? Did I kill that man? Are they going to find us?" I sighed and began to sob.

He shook his head and placed his cigarette in his mouth. "He didn't know our names. There wasn't even anybody else who saw." He handed me a cigarette. I pushed it away and stood from the couch.

"No, this is your fault," I said, picking up my bag and coat from the coffee table. He laughed and looked at me, bewildered.

"Me? You're the one who decided to fuck a self-professed criminal. Did you think that I would suddenly become innocent?"

"Well, I didn't think you'd become so possessive and creepy. I thought we'd see each other once and then pretend like we barely knew each other. You would go to jail but... we would have a good time." I said defensively.

Arthur put out his cigarette on the couch. "That is so fucking selfish."

I scowled. He scowled back.

Then I eyed the ashtray sitting on the coffee table and smirked.

"I know, I am fucking selfish," I said while hurling the ashtray as hard as I could at the television. I heard the loud crack and then ran out of his apartment as quickly as I could.

I fumbled with my keys outside of my door and my heart raced as I could hear his footsteps coming closer.

Finally, I swung the door open, slammed it behind me, and locked it. Milliseconds later Arthur banged loudly on the door.

" Go away!" I yelled. He stopped and there was silence, and then laughter. He walked back into his apartment and slammed the door. I could still hear his laughter through the walls. I shuddered and collapsed onto my couch. I turned on the television and tried to occupy my mind, ignoring the silent tears rolling down my face.

A while later I began to doze off but was jolted awake when I heard visitors outside of Arthur's door. I turned the television down and ran to the wall to listen.

I can't hear anything. I thought and sighed to myself. They're talking way too quietly.

Now disinterested, I went back to watching the television.

Then there was screaming.

I turned the television off completely and froze while listening to screams.

What is he doing now? Murdering his visitors?

Finally, after a minute or so the screams stopped.

What the fuck? I mouthed to myself. Listening for any clues on what the hell just happened.

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

I sighed and turned the television back on. Finally falling into a deep sleep.

… … … … ...

Then once again, loud noises. I jumped up at the banging on my door.

"Who is it?" I yelled out.

"You know who," Probably Arthur, replied. I got up and looked through the peephole.

"Arthur?" I said while observing the fuzzy figure outside with green hair and a full face of makeup. I unlocked the door but kept the chain on so it wouldn't open fully. I looked outside, making sure no weapon was pointed at me first.

"Jesus, you really did go all out." I took a good look at his whole outfit and nodded with approval. "So… did you need something?"

Arthur grinned. "I came to apologize," He said happily. He held out a bundle of fake flowers and I stared at him blankly.

"Arthur, I'm the one who threw an ashtray at your television," I said.

"I know. Just take this and watch The Murray Franklin Show tonight, okay?" He pushed the bundle of fake flowers through the door and I begrudgingly grabbed them.

"Okay. I will." He gave me an unnatural smile. I closed the door and went back towards the television.

Well, I didn't expect that. I thought while looking at the flowers. Then I walked over to the window just in time to see Arthur prancing across the courtyard, basically dancing. I smiled.

"I'm sure you'll entertain everybody," I said to myself and placed the flowers on the windowsill.


	5. Chapter 5

Arthur's, or rather, Joker's- segment finally came.

I think everyone watching gasped at the same moment when Arthur put that gun to Murray's head and shot him point-blank. Arthur tried to make a closing statement, but he was cut off by the network. I started at the television set blankly, wondering if I had just witnessed history.

Still in a daze, I walked over to the window. People started to fill the streets and chant.

"Kill the rich! Kill the rich!"

I thought about Arthur's words on how he had been treated and wondered what he had been feeling the last couple of weeks. I sighed and considered something that I would have never considered months ago: joining him.

The rioting outside worsened as I watched a group of people set a car on fire. A giant fire started and lit the area. The light-filled the area and the colors bounced off the sides of the building.

Then, I ran to my closet and grabbed a jacket. Nothing else.

I exited my apartment and then looked briefly towards Arthur's. A strange thought crossed my mind.

I looked around quickly to make sure there was nobody around to see what I was about to do.

Cautiously, I placed my hand on the doorknob and slowly turned it. It was unlocked.

I opened the door, turned the light on and immediately jumped.

" Oh my fucking god!" I yelled.

There was blood everywhere in the hallway and a heavily disfigured body. I gagged. It must have been the sounds from earlier.

Trying to ignore the body, I looked into the kitchen. A clown mask sat on the counter. I picked it up, perplexed.

He has face paint, why would he need this? I thought.

I put the mask on. A good of a sign as any, I guess and made a dash to the door.

I glanced at the body again and felt a chill.

Then, I ran.

And ran.

And ran.

The streets were filled with hundreds of people, but I blended in well thanks to the mask.

The venue that hosted the Murray show wasn't too far from the apartment, and the trip was made even shorter thanks to me being able to run easily through the streets as all regular traffic was forced to yield to the rioters in the streets.

As I approached the venue, police lights flashed in the distance and I noticed that the area was taped off. I got as close as I could and scanned every face in the crowd, looking for Arthur.

Then, my ears picked up a bit of important information. It was in the distance and hard to hear, but the three keywords I heard confirmed my assumption.

"...let's take him." I watched two officers step into a nearby police car.

" Shit," I said under my breath. I at least wanted to say some sort of parting words before potentially never seeing him again. My mind raced and I scanned the scene, trying to think of how I could reach him. I probably shouldn't try to convince the police to let him go. That would definitely fail.

The rioting seemed to get worse by the minute.

Then finally, something clicked in my mind. These people would do anything for him. He's their god.

I eyed a group of somewhat unruly rioters and ran up to them.

" Hey! " I yelled at them. " The police are taking him! The Joker!" They stared at me.

I gathered my thoughts first and then told them my idea.

"If we take that ambulance we can get through the streets and-" My brain struggled to find the right words.

"Kill the police?" One of the men said. He was wearing the same clown mask as everyone else and his clothes looked excessively worn. I nodded, "That's right, kill them."

We tried to stealthily approach the ambulance at first, but as we got closer we noticed that there was nobody in it anyway. The back was open as well with the gurney missing.

All three of us hopped into the front of the ambulance, it was a tight squeeze but we successfully stayed out of the police's view. I guess they assumed nobody would steal an ambulance, and yet here we were.

"They headed that way," I pointed down the street. You could barely see the police car in the distance.

We sped off and the man who seemed fine with the idea of killing a police officer held his hand out.

"I'm Ken, by the way. And that's Don." I hesitantly shook both their hands.

"Then you can call me Vic," I said.

Ken moved the car abruptly, dodging plenty of obstacles that were in the streets.

"We're gonna have to be a bit reckless, so hold on." He quickly turned a corner and lost the car briefly.

"Wait-" I started. "The car-"

But before I could complain he sped up as quickly as possible. I closed my eyes as he accelerated through blatant reds, honking the horn wildly and banking on the fact that we were an ambulance and people would yield.

" Fuck! " I yelled as he turned the corner and I attempted to grab onto something. I was unsuccessful and fell into Don. We accelerated so quickly that by the time I could pull myself up, the last thing I saw was blinking lights.

We crashed.

This time I was holding onto something. Thank god.

I rubbed my muscles in pain but then looked out the window while Ken exited the ambulance.

"Arthur-" I said, practically throwing myself out of the ambulance. I held my breath as Ken and Don lifted Arthur out of the completely totaled police car and placed him on the hood.

I lifted my mask up and held Arthur's face. "Arthur, can you hear me? Are you okay?" Finally, he started to stir. I sighed in relief. "I can't believe those policemen didn't beat you to a pulp before taking you away for what you did."

Arthur slowly brought himself up. "What are you doing here?" He said with an amused smile. I laughed and then briefly paused. Trying to think of the answer to his question. I wasn't even really sure why I came.

"I felt bad and I knew that there was a chance I would never see you again." Arthur looked around, confused. "And there's some sort of revolution happening, I guess. I thought I'd join since you had an extra mask."

I watched Arthur's face as it went through a number of emotions. From confused, shocked, and then finally to elated. I smiled as he stood to fully see the crowd around him. He moved with confidence like he finally knew who he was.

Then he quickly stopped and looked at me.

"We have to go." He said, grabbing my arm.

"What?" I said. "It feels pretty safe here, surrounded by all these people who adore you."

He laughed. "I like it too, but they're coming." I looked around and tried to see what Arthur was talking about. I caught Don and Ken's eyes. "Sorry! But thank you!" I felt bad that Arthur didn't acknowledge them, even though they were the ones who saved him.

We squeezed through the crowd, which seemed to get bigger as we tried to get away. People wanted to follow Arthur, but it was terrible for our cover.

"This is a wanted man!" I yelled. "Get out of the way if you don't want him to go to jail!"

It didn't help.

We resorted to running and turning into strange places.

Once we were thoroughly out of breath and, hopefully safe, in an alley-looking area, we relaxed for a brief moment. I looked at the plants, tables, and chairs that were also in the alley.

Then, Arthur placed his hand on my waist. I turned towards him and before I could say anything he planted a kiss on my lips. It only lasted for a few seconds but when he pulled away he gazed deeply into my eyes. I smirked. "So forward," I joked.

"I don't think we can be together for very long." He said with a serious look.

I put my hands on his shoulders and stood close to him. "I know," I said sadly. Admittedly, between running out of my apartment and hitting him with an ambulance I hadn't taken the chance to truly consider what would happen next with us. Arthur was probably going to be charged with at least three murders now and I also didn't have a great track record going either. But I decided it wasn't worth worrying about yet.

I kissed him back passionately and savored the moment. I gripped his suit tightly and felt everything rushing through my veins at once. My heart throbbed and I felt a few tears forming in my eyes but ignored them.

It felt like heaven for a few moments, with every worry pushed into the back of my mind, the feeling of Arthur completely enamored with me.

I paused for a moment and looked at him with seriousness. "So, am I allowed to say 'I love you' now?" I gave him a small smile. He smiled back, but with resistance behind his grin.

"I think it'll be easier if you're not attached, but go ahead," he said it so nonchalantly. I shook my head, "we should keep moving. "

He grabbed my hand and smiled, then walked with a hop in his step. As he pulled me along he tried to twirl me around. Surprised, I cooperated but almost fell over and yelped. Arthur just continued on and we exited the alley back into the rest of the world again.

I held onto the feeling of freedom and acceptance, even though I knew it would be fleeting.

It was nice to feel, if just for a while.


	6. Chapter 6

just realized it did not upload properly the first time lol. sorry~

Don't fuck with me, don't fuck with me  
Since you shipped my ass off to sea  
I never knew where I was goin'  
I went where the water was flowin'

\- DOT

Do you ever decide to do something, and in the moment it seems like a brilliant idea, but later you find out it was quite possibly the worst decision you could have made?

That's the exact feeling I felt while running hand in hand with the man who had committed a murder on live television just hours ago.

In the moments my brain wasn't bombarded with the illusion of dopamine, I had time to think about who exactly I had become around Arthur.

With this realization, I stopped dead in my tracks.

"We're stopping again?" Arthur asked me, an annoyance in his voice.

"Arthur, are you going to turn me in if you get caught?" I said to him, a frown plastered on my face. He stepped towards me, also taking the opportunity to light a cigarette.

"What would I have to gain from turning you in?" He asked me, smoke leaking from his mouth.

"Let's be honest, Arthur, you don't exactly operate on reason," I said. He put his hand up and stopped me briefly

"Actually, call me Joker now." He threw the used cigarette away. I watched it roll on the ground into the sewer and then looked at him, still waiting for his answer to what he would do with the dirt on me.

Instead, he held his hand out to me.

"Let's just enjoy this fleeting moment." He said to me. I sighed but took his hand anyway.

When we turned the next corner, we both nearly jumped out of our skin at the sight of a police car. Looking around frantically, I pointed out a building on the other side of the street that had only been partially boarded up.

We crawled inside it and went to the top story. It was a pretty good hiding space with minimal light and few pieces of furniture left. Arthur suggested that we try to hide indefinitely.

I agreed that it was probably the best thing to do meanwhile. I didn't want to face the consequences of my actions quite yet.

But then our minutes turned into hours, and our hours into days.

On the third day, I was really close to being ready to face the action of my consequences if it meant being able to go outside to find a shower and a real bed. I had been cooped up but seen Arthur occasionally go outside for god knows what.

This was also that day that I couldn't take it anymore.

I sat up from the metal desk I had been laying on and spotted Arthur in the corner dancing while he did some thinking. I sighed.

"Arth- I mean- sigh , Joker, we can't keep living like this," I said to him and stood up off the desk. "We've got to make a move at some point."

Arthur stopped and looked at me. "Do you want me to be arrested?" He asked me.

I was offended. "Of course not, but what's the difference between being dead and doing absolutely nothing here?" I asked him. He walked up to me and grabbed my chin. I frowned at him.

"We're going to stay here, okay?" He said to me and gave me a peck on the lips.

That was it.

I began to walk down the stairs to exit the building. I almost made it out but was stopped by Arthur towering behind me.

My stomach turned as I realized what was pressed against my back. I stopped moving immediately, the cold metal cooling my skin. I held my breath in anticipation.

"I need you to do something for me." Arthur started. "It's not anything bad, in fact, it's kind of a funny joke."

I gulped. I had heard his definition of a funny joke three days ago and knew it was definitely bad.

He turned me around to face him.

"This way it's fair. I keep your secret and you do a favor for me." He smiled at me. I wished he wouldn't.

He stroked the back of my head. "I want you to bring me someone. There's a burial happening tomorrow."

"A burial?" I asked, "Like for a funeral?" Arthur nodded.

"There should only be two people there, according to my guy on the outside. I want the younger one." He handed me a small revolver that he had been keeping in his pocket. Where the hell was he getting weapons and intel? Were his followers that devoted?

I took the revolver. "I'll do it but on one condition. I want a real fucking place to stay."

* * *

My request was fulfilled, it wasn't the nicest motel in Gotham but I also knew that we couldn't get away with staying at a nicer place.

I went up to the counter alone and got a room. As the woman at the counter was writing something I hesitated. "Also, can I get two beds?" I asked her. She nodded.

I kept telling myself that my time with Arthur was limited and that it was probably for the best. You probably shouldn't spend too much time around someone who willingly presses a gun to your back for demands, but then turns around and sweet-talks you.

I took the key and headed to the room with Arthur. We went in and looked around the room. It wasn't great , but for a budget motel, it was okay.

"They gave us two beds?" Arthur wondered out loud.

"Uh, yeah, I guess she gave me a free room upgrade," I said.

Without another word, I headed to the bathroom. I needed that hot shower. Arthur too as he tried his best to get the makeup off but there were some spots he couldn't get off. Pretty disappointing too since he made us stop for more makeup.

Once I finished my shower I tried to wash my clothes with shampoo and water. It wasn't great but it worked. I put on a towel and exited the bathroom to see Arthur watching the news. I walked over and looked at the screen.

" Holy shit!" I said out loud.

It was me, on the screen. Goddamn, those Gotham detectives were good. But it was probably only a matter of time since we were both missing at this point, and I had been questioned before.

I sighed and sat on the bed Arthur wasn't on. "I think we should go to sleep soon, seeing that just fucked me up." I dried my hair with another towel. Arthur turned off the television.

"Probably." Was all he said. He stood up to take his turn in the bathroom. I hung my clothes up, hoping they would dry completely overnight.

I left one light on and then slipped under the covers of the bed I had been sitting on.

The sound of the shower provided some white noise as I started to slowly drift off to sleep.

* * *

The next morning was Burial Day. We both got ready in silence and then got ready to head out. I rolled my eyes at Arthur once again in his full Joker attire. I wasn't sure how he expected to hide from the law when dressed like that.

Arthur had us walk to a phone booth so he could make a call. I noticed that the temperature had plummeted and the sky threatened to throw precipitation. I stood outside the phone booth and waited, anxiously scanning our environment. After about 10 minutes Arthur finally stepped out.

"There's a car coming for us, we'll be picked up and taken to the graveyard. They're going to bring you flowers so you can pose as just a typical visitor." Arthur lit a cigarette.

"Okay." Was all I said, giving him an attitude. I was still pissed off from last night.

The car actually came pretty quickly, I guess we didn't walk far. Arthur got into the front passenger seat and I climbed in the back.

Arthur and the driver chatted a bit about the recent events and the driver expressed his gratitude for what he had been doing. I just stared out the window at Gotham, listening to their conversation but saying nothing.

We arrived at the entrance of the cemetery. Arthur handed me the flowers that the driver brought and told me that I should be looking for the graves of Martha and Thomas Wayne, but we wanted Bruce. My mind turned at their names. They were oddly familiar.

"Just try to be inconspicuous and then take the opportunity when it comes. We'll pull up and help you when it's time." The driver told me.

I put my hand on my coat pocket to check for the revolver. It was still there.

I got out of the car without a word and began to walk down the road paved through the cemetery. It wasn't a huge cemetery, but the only people were far away enough to be small figures.

The cemetery was scattered with gravestones of various sizes and shapes. A small drizzle began from the sky and stuck to the grass. The road began to turn darker.

I finally got close enough to the figures that I had initially seen in the distance. There was, of course, a giant hole and two caskets. I counted six people. Four of them looked like they were helping with lowering the casket and then, as Arthur predicted, two were in formal, black clothing.

I furrowed my brows and squinted my eyes at the two who were visitors. One of them looked at least 40, but for the second, I had to triple-check what I was seeing.

I thought it couldn't be true, but as I walked closer and the figures became clearer, I knew it had to be.

It was a child. Arthur was trying to kidnap a fucking child.

I headed towards a random grave about 10 feet behind them as I walked closer.

I stood in front of the grave I had randomly selected, it read Cynthia Villa, b. 1963 d. 1981 .

What a grave to randomly pick, someone so young. I thought to myself and wondered about the cause of her death.

Foregoing all else, I continued with my act and placed the flowers on the ground. I got on my knees and into a praying position. I sat in silence and listened to the burial happening in front of me. The small sobs of a child echoed through the air.

I closed my eyes.

Fuck. I thought as I pieced the situation happening in front of me together. I can't possibly do this. Kidnap a recently orphaned child?

I heard a car in the distance, driving on the opposite side of the 'island' the road formed. They're probably expecting me to do something soon . The sound continued to come closer.

It was now or never. They would definitely take the situation in their own hands if they needed to.

I stood up abruptly and started to walk towards my 'victims'.

"Excuse me," I said loudly. They all turned to look at me. "I- I don't want to alarm you, but you're in danger, you need to get out of here."

They blinked at me. The older visiting man stepped towards me and defensively in front of who I assumed was Bruce Wayne. "Excuse me?" He asked.

"I was sent to take him, to kidnap him," I pointed towards Bruce. "But I didn't know he was a child, so I'm giving you a chance to escape. "

The sound of the car was finally right behind me. I heard the engine turn off and glanced over my shoulder.

I looked back at Bruce with a worried expression.

They all stepped back slightly, still in disbelief and confusion.

I sighed and pulled out my revolver, hoping it might encourage them a bit more.

" Go!" I yelled at them.

They finally ran towards the car they had parked near the grave. The workers helping with the burial also scurried away worriedly, unsure of what was happening. The car managed to drive away remarkably fast, and the layout of the cemetery made it fruitless for Arthur and his driver to try and pursue them.

I looked towards the car with Arthur and his driver. I could imagine their frustrated exclamations happening inside the car.

They both got out. I heard a loud laughing from Arthur and the driver immediately turned towards me and yelled: " What the fuck ?!" Arthur said something back to him that I couldn't make it out. They started to walk towards me, I stood still. Arthur slowly stopped laughing as they approached.

"Vicky, honey," Arthur said, I gave him a dirty look for the stupid nickname. "What happened?" He asked me in a fake sweet voice. I could clearly see rage on the drivers' face, I assumed Arthur felt the same but knew that I could be manipulated easier this way.

"I could ask you the same question. A child , Arthur?" I said. His face turned darker. He sighed lightly.

"How many times do I have to tell you to call me Joker?" He said.

I laughed slightly. "From now on, never." I threw the revolver that he had given me on the ground. "Because you're never going to see me again. I'm leaving. Feel free to shoot me as I leave, I don't care." I turned around and started to walk. I heard the sound of a weapon preparing behind me, but nothing after that.

They didn't shoot. I gulped, unsure of what I was doing or even where I was walking to. But I still faced forward, not looking back.

I heard the car start again and begin to drive off. I looked straight ahead.

I wasn't sure of anything, but one word lingered in my mind. Revenge. There was already proof that I wasn't as powerless as I felt. Maybe Arthur didn't shoot because he knew that all I had waiting for me were consequences. Admittedly, I wasn't sure how my intended one-night-stand with a neighbor had turned into me ready to turn us all in for a crime. But I also pondered about whether I would choose to change it.

My midterms absolutely didn't matter now, that was true.

And revenge, the word was exciting. I still needed that.

Still, I walked until I found myself at the front of a police station.

I took a deep breath and stepped inside, ready to finally end this madness.


End file.
